i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
