i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
