my mouth tastes like poor choices
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
