forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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