come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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