I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize