my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I smell like Dick and happiness
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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