I think i peed on brittanys purse
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
