I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
