I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
