I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
