Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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