I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
