bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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