Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
