I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
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