Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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