didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
