Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
