Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
