Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
