it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
