We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
