and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
