Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize