My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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