So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I could fuck to npr.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
