I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Randomize
