well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
