Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
