Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
