he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
