it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
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