So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize