I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
