There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
