There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Randomize
