Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
