My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
