Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
