just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
