I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
