Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
