She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
