Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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