he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Randomize
