I need help removing her.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
