Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize
