We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
