I think i sorta joined a cult last night
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
