True but thats because hes a fetus.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Randomize
